Divorce-proofing your marriage is going to require good communication. YourTango.com asked mental health professionals the secrets to successful marriages, and not surprisingly, good avenues of communication came out on top.
“And the number two response, that I feel is important for everyone to take to heart, is making their spouse or significant other a priority,” YourTango CEO Andrea Miller tells KTRH News. “It’s so easy to put kids first, and a job first, and 500 other things first, but my golden rule is you have to put your spouse first.”
Difficulty with communications was cited as the most common factor in divorces 65% of the time. An inability to resolve conflict was cited as the number two cause, at 43%.
The top communication problem cited by 70% of husbands is nagging, while 83% of wives complain that their feelings aren’t validated.
Andrea Miller tells KTRH the biggest obstacle to a peaceful divorce is a prenuptial agreement. She suggests finding a good therapist is more important than finding a good lawyer.
The biggest factor couples cite for staying in an unfulfilling marriage is the kids, though mental health professionals say it’s worse for the kids if parents stay in an unhappy marriage.
Miller says the number one trait of successful couples is pursuing individual interests and hobbies, followed by learning to argue in a healthy way.